Heute ist es wieder online, der Weblog, der vorgibt von Joe Celko zu sein:
Joe Celko The SQL Apprentice

Hier ein paar Highlights:

Question: >> Is there a function that can take an @Variable that will drop a table? I can't seem to be able to get Drop Table @Variable to work because Drop Table doesn't want a string, it wants the plain table name. << Joe: Don't write code like this, nor use that mental model for RDBMS. A table models a set of entities or relationships. Having tables appear and disappear in an application is like a magic world in which elephants drop from the sky or mountains dissolve in an instant. [...]

Have you considered using a relational design instead mimicking a
magnetic tape file? There is no such thing as a vague, universal id that you can use to mark all the things in creation. Auto-increment is a way of saying that you have no idea what a key is – and it ain't a physical locator generated by the hardware!

I see that teams have no names, that you have no referencing among the tables, so they are totally unrelated. Instead of computing standing and results, you seem to want to write them to physical storage, thus missing the basic point that tables – unlike files – can be virtual tables. […]

Bei SQL Server Code wird ihm auch eine coole Äußerung zugeschrieben, die ich bei ihm zwar nicht finden konnte, die aber typisch klingt:

Question: >> how to set the PK in SS Mgmt Studio ? << Joe: Who cares?? You are not not a real SQL programmer!! You are a "mousey, mousey, click , click" non-programmer. (with a French accent) we spit on you, Video gamer! to be serious, real programmers use a text editor. They know the language they write in. Those stinking "video game tools"slow us down. And they lead us to ask questiosn like this in newsgroups where people liek me will maek fun of you.


Aber bei Ken Henderson bestreitet Joe diesen Weblog zu betreiben. Es scheint sich um eine sehr gut gemachte Fälschung zu handeln. Ich finde den Fake jedenfalls unterhaltsamer als die meisten "echten" Blogs… 😉